I don’t have Instagram but I think this internal dissonance can still exist outside these apps. As an Instagram non-user, the closest thing I can think of is Kafka’s quote “I was ashamed of myself when I realized that life was a costume party, and I attended with my real face.” Seems like societal inauthenticity has been creating angst for a while, but it’s more common and conspicuous now.
That's a great quote and a good point. You are probably right. This tendency to have a split personality has probably existed long before social media but as you say it's just more obvious now.
I have slowly but surely drifted away from Instagram and I’ve lost the desire to share highlight reels. I think a revolution is brewing when it comes to social media in general. We are tired of being duped by the tech giants.
I'm right there with ya Amy. Every time I resist the urge to open up Instagram is guaranteed to make me feel more peaceful. The tech giants never had our best interests at heart.
Huh, well these days most of what I post on Instagram are links to my Substack where I am definitely being a more crafted and structured (and longer form) version of iMessage me. So the gap between the two is about as short as my legal advisors allow.
That's probably the best use of Instagram for us writers these days :) I did that too when I first started but have slowly been trying to wean myself from Instagram and have never looked back.
Then there are those of us with a LinkedIn you… which is not much more than Instagram you in a suit and tie but distinct enough it’s yet another you to mentally contend with.
Instagram me doesn't exist and I'm not sure I know what iMessage is (I can only assume it's some Apple related thing) - I consider myself to be very lucky 😂
I should disclose, my parrot does have an Instagram. But I strictly follow only other crazy bird people on there. So in the rare occasion that I log into Instagram I'm greeted by hundreds of other parrots. So it's a delightful place to be 😆
All in your own time. It took me over a year and a half of actively hating it, and trying to make it sustainable and authentic for me before I let it go. I actually wrote about it during the month of June on my substack about how I went from addicted to Instagram to apathetic.
Moderation seems like the logical approach but I'm just not sure its feasible with how inherently addicting these apps are. I'd love to read what you wrote!
I also did some journalling prompts and other resources for those working through their relationship with social media - it's all linked in the post I shared above :)
This was a great read! I often feel like there are different parts of my personality that share with different people. I never thought it fully applied to how I engage or present myself on social media as well. Maybe I have multiple personalities, or maybe I’m just layered like an onion… but great conversation:)
IG is maddening. Everyone wants to be authentic, but no one wants to be the first person to do it. so while we all wait for someone to go first, we continue this charade of inauthenticity. I like Substack and Notes because it sort of fills that middle gap between our iMessage selves and our Instagram selves.
I tried to join Instagram but I don't know how to live a fake life. I don't know how to filter my photos. My background isn't fit for Instagram. It's hard being something else on Instagram
You make lots of interesting points here. I think it’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling a “need” to share on IG because a lot of our peers do. A couple years ago I decided to drastically reduce posting on IG because it didn’t feel genuine anymore.
Thanks Daniel. I'm right there with you. I still have my IG account but I hardly ever post or even scroll. But I still can't bring myself to delete my account for some reason...
I've definitely caught myself curating my online persona, always trying to present the "best" version of myself. It's exhausting, and honestly, it feels kinda fake. I love how you put it: "Instagram you is a fraud." It's so true! I'm starting to realize that the more I try to be someone I'm not, the more miserable I become. I'm not saying we should all air our dirty laundry on social media, but maybe there's a middle ground, a way to be more authentic without oversharing.
This article raises some interesting questions about identity and self-presentation in the digital age. Are we becoming increasingly fragmented, with different versions of ourselves existing in different online spaces? Is it even possible to be truly authentic online, or are we all just performing for an audience? And if so, what are the consequences of this constant performance?
You put it better than I did. And your questions are so on point. I'm right there in the trenches fighting the good fight with you. Counterintuitively, I think the less flashy and more authentic versions of ourselves are what people are craving for. True connection doesn't come from sharing our highlight reels. People want to know what's going on behind closed doors (to an extent) like you mentioned.
I don’t have that slither of an enviable life to put on show. I think I’m the most boring person anyone around me knows. And I love it that way. But I totally get the point here.
Neither do most of the people who claim their lives are all rainbows and sunshines on social media. All of us are more boring than we care to admit. But like you, I love my boring life :)
I don’t have Instagram but I think this internal dissonance can still exist outside these apps. As an Instagram non-user, the closest thing I can think of is Kafka’s quote “I was ashamed of myself when I realized that life was a costume party, and I attended with my real face.” Seems like societal inauthenticity has been creating angst for a while, but it’s more common and conspicuous now.
That's a great quote and a good point. You are probably right. This tendency to have a split personality has probably existed long before social media but as you say it's just more obvious now.
Good point! I think the more comfortable we become in showing our “real face” with the world, the less dissonance there is on these apps or elsewhere
I have slowly but surely drifted away from Instagram and I’ve lost the desire to share highlight reels. I think a revolution is brewing when it comes to social media in general. We are tired of being duped by the tech giants.
I'm right there with ya Amy. Every time I resist the urge to open up Instagram is guaranteed to make me feel more peaceful. The tech giants never had our best interests at heart.
IG me went AWOL a few years ago. Hasn’t been seen since. Not sure he’ll ever report for duty.
But what about all those golden hour selfies the world is begging for???
Huh, well these days most of what I post on Instagram are links to my Substack where I am definitely being a more crafted and structured (and longer form) version of iMessage me. So the gap between the two is about as short as my legal advisors allow.
That's probably the best use of Instagram for us writers these days :) I did that too when I first started but have slowly been trying to wean myself from Instagram and have never looked back.
Then there are those of us with a LinkedIn you… which is not much more than Instagram you in a suit and tie but distinct enough it’s yet another you to mentally contend with.
Haha that's a good point. Linkedin you may be the fakest version of all...
...what about just trying to do youyou no matter where you you?...
but I want to see the iMessage you do more you because that's where you shine :)
...i think i might just start doing what’s app impressions instead...
I'm here for it
Instagram me doesn't exist and I'm not sure I know what iMessage is (I can only assume it's some Apple related thing) - I consider myself to be very lucky 😂
You are a rare breed. And I'm kinda jealous!
I should disclose, my parrot does have an Instagram. But I strictly follow only other crazy bird people on there. So in the rare occasion that I log into Instagram I'm greeted by hundreds of other parrots. So it's a delightful place to be 😆
Hahaha that's fantastic! I hope your parrot hasn't gotten addicted...
He's pretty bad at keeping up with his Instagram to be honest
good for him. we could all stand to benefit from doing the same!
I’ve chosen to leave IG behind because the gap was killing me
You are stronger than me. I have been wanting to for years but still haven't taken the plunge. Maybe it's time....
All in your own time. It took me over a year and a half of actively hating it, and trying to make it sustainable and authentic for me before I let it go. I actually wrote about it during the month of June on my substack about how I went from addicted to Instagram to apathetic.
Moderation seems like the logical approach but I'm just not sure its feasible with how inherently addicting these apps are. I'd love to read what you wrote!
Here's the summary post "From social media addict to apathetic": https://thebreathingspace.substack.com/p/relationship-status-update-separated
I also did some journalling prompts and other resources for those working through their relationship with social media - it's all linked in the post I shared above :)
Thank you. Excited to check it out!
This was a great read! I often feel like there are different parts of my personality that share with different people. I never thought it fully applied to how I engage or present myself on social media as well. Maybe I have multiple personalities, or maybe I’m just layered like an onion… but great conversation:)
Glad you enjoyed it Marco! Haha yes as the wise Shrek once said "we are all layered like onions".
IG is maddening. Everyone wants to be authentic, but no one wants to be the first person to do it. so while we all wait for someone to go first, we continue this charade of inauthenticity. I like Substack and Notes because it sort of fills that middle gap between our iMessage selves and our Instagram selves.
Totally agree. I'm forever grateful for joining Substack. It may be the last sane place to exist on the internet.
I tried to join Instagram but I don't know how to live a fake life. I don't know how to filter my photos. My background isn't fit for Instagram. It's hard being something else on Instagram
Good for you Edwin! Not knowing how to live or show off a fake life is a gift.
You make lots of interesting points here. I think it’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling a “need” to share on IG because a lot of our peers do. A couple years ago I decided to drastically reduce posting on IG because it didn’t feel genuine anymore.
Thanks Daniel. I'm right there with you. I still have my IG account but I hardly ever post or even scroll. But I still can't bring myself to delete my account for some reason...
I know how feeling. I keep mine because the old images are a fun keepsake or memento of the past.
That's true. I should go back and look at those more often. It's fun and horrifying see what I thought was worth sharing years ago.
I've definitely caught myself curating my online persona, always trying to present the "best" version of myself. It's exhausting, and honestly, it feels kinda fake. I love how you put it: "Instagram you is a fraud." It's so true! I'm starting to realize that the more I try to be someone I'm not, the more miserable I become. I'm not saying we should all air our dirty laundry on social media, but maybe there's a middle ground, a way to be more authentic without oversharing.
This article raises some interesting questions about identity and self-presentation in the digital age. Are we becoming increasingly fragmented, with different versions of ourselves existing in different online spaces? Is it even possible to be truly authentic online, or are we all just performing for an audience? And if so, what are the consequences of this constant performance?
You put it better than I did. And your questions are so on point. I'm right there in the trenches fighting the good fight with you. Counterintuitively, I think the less flashy and more authentic versions of ourselves are what people are craving for. True connection doesn't come from sharing our highlight reels. People want to know what's going on behind closed doors (to an extent) like you mentioned.
I don’t have that slither of an enviable life to put on show. I think I’m the most boring person anyone around me knows. And I love it that way. But I totally get the point here.
Neither do most of the people who claim their lives are all rainbows and sunshines on social media. All of us are more boring than we care to admit. But like you, I love my boring life :)